In response to the shooting death of Mary Spears in Detroit.
I cant make this shit up. Men……..I swear they just don’t understand the fear of being a woman
hek23 “Ok I’m confused, women do you want a thug or not?”
It seems like a hideously shitty idea to give your number to someone who’d physically attack you for not giving it.
"Oh, a person that dangerous and unstable definitely won’t use my number to call me or find out where I live or stalk me or anything!"
Not sure if dude here is really dumb, talking about fake numbers, or just using potential violence as an excuse to try and convince people to give him numbers.
What they usually ignore is that giving fake numbers will put you at risk as well
Men have gotten smarter by calling that number right in front of you to make sure that is your number
That calling the number right in front of me shit happened to me a couple times.
Thankfully, none of those dudes EVER called me again, but the fact that they would call the number with me standing there would fill me with dread and tell me immediately what kind of person he is.
Like, nigga, IF it’s a fake number, WHAT you gon DO to me?
I think they were just asking for my number for sport, cause they never actually called me again,
But I shudder to think about how many times this could have been me,
How it angers me that I have to ‘have a boyfriend’ because dudes will respect another man before they’ll respect ME and my right to not want they ass.
Actually Tashabilities… she told him that she had a boyfriend. And Thats when he killed her.
THE ACTUAL HELL MAN?! I can’t.
Every possible scenario when a man tries to kill a woman over her phone number, people will find a way to blame her for what he did:
- You ignore him, so he attacks you. “Why couldn’t you just be polite? Why would you provoke someone who was obviously violent?”
- You try to politely turn him down, so he attacks you. “Why couldn’t you just pretend to be interested? Why would you provoke someone who was obviously violent?”
- You fake interest because you’re scared he’s going to hurt you. He thinks you’re serious and won’t leave you alone and then he attacks you when you finally try to shake him off politely with a totally reasonable excuse. “Why’d you lead him on? Why would you encourage someone who was obviously violent?”
- You give him your phone number to get him to leave you alone. He starts calling you a lot, but you don’t answer, so he tracks you down, and then he attacks you. “Why did you give him your phone number? Why would you encourage someone who was obviously violent?”
- You give him your fake phone number to get him to leave you alone. He realizes it’s not your real number, so he attacks you. “Why would you give him a fake phone number? Why would you provoke someone who was obviously violent?”
- You give him your real phone number and you try to be nice when you call. Eventually he realizes you’re not actually interested and attacks you. “Why did you lead him on? Why would you encourage someone who was obviously violent?”
- You give him your real phone number and end up being harassed into a relationship with someone who is obviously violent because you are scared for your life. He eventually tries to kill you anyhow for nebulous reasons that ultimately boil down to: he can’t completely control you the way he wants to because you are a person, not a doll. “Why do women date violent men? I don’t understand why they don’t just leave.”
I’ve heard all of these arguments in all of these situations. Men use harassment, coercion, and violence to try to get what they believe they are entitled to from women, and the woman gets blamed no matter what. Men are never expected to take responsibility for their bad behavior, because their sense of entitlement is never questioned by our misogynistic patriarchal society. In our warped society, it is reasonable for men to expect that women should be compliant, should be willing to give any man who wants them exclusive rights to her body, sex, affection, and love, and so it is reasonable for men to become violent when a woman acts in any way that denies men control over her person.
Therefore, when a man gets violent, the problem is not the man and his sense of entitlement, it is the woman, who didn’t do “what she was supposed to” even if there is absolutely nothing she could do, short of giving up her autonomy and personhood entirely. And men who get violent when women refuse to comply do so to remind them: if you won’t surrender your personhood willingly, we will take it from you by force.
This is about control, not a phone number.
Why all men are responsible for stopping this. ALL MEN